So my wife (26F) and I (28M) have been married for a year and began trying to conceive in September. No luck so far but the doctor did say at our first appointment that it typically takes close to a year for most couples to conceive. She’s been telling people that she’s infertile (which isn’t true, doctor said she isn’t).
My wife and I went to my work Christmas party in mid December, where my wife met my coworkers wife (let’s call her Mary) and they took a liking to each other. Mary was pregnant and invited my wife to her baby shower (which was yesterday), and my wife sounded excited to go. I asked her when we were alone if she thinks she’ll be fine. I know my wife and I know what typically bothers her. I knew she wouldn’t bask in happiness over someone else’s pregnancy so I urged her to think it through. She said she’s fine and she was excited so she went.
The baby shower was yesterday. About 40 minutes in, she calls me and asks me to come. I was at a cafe nearby because I knew she wouldn’t stay long. I find her at the entrance of the house crying and a BUNCH of women consoling her. When she saw me she came to me and pulled me to the garden to talk. She said she was dancing and looked at Mary’s pregnant belly and couldn’t take it anymore, started crying and ran out. All of Mary’s friends followed her out to console her. I consoled her myself, and said “ok let’s go babe. Where do you want to go? We can go for a drive so you can feel better”, she looked at me weird and asked why she would leave. I asked why she would stay. She said she feels better now and can go have a good time. I sighed and said “babe, you know that’s not going to happen. And I doubt the attention will be on Mary after this and that’s not great. It’s her baby shower and she deserves to be celebrated. I can’t see how people are going to shift their focus from consoling you to celebrating her if you’re still there”. She rolled her eyes at me and said she was going back in and that I could leave.
3 hours later, the party was nearing its end so I go back to pick her up. My coworker and I stepped into the house and lo and behold, everyone is sitting in a circle with my wife being the centre of attention. Coworker looked for his wife and she wasn’t there at all. He called her and she said she had left ages ago.
My wife and I entered the car and I first asked her how she was feeling and we spoke about it for a few minutes. I then asked her what happened and why Mary left. She said “oh crap, Mary. I forgot to say bye to her”. I told her Mary left ages ago. I then said “I know you’re going through a hard time but why on earth would you and her friends do this? If they consoled you for a few minutes that’s fine but the entire party? We really should’ve left earlier”. She looked at me so offended and said “are you Mary’s husband or mine?”. We stared at each other for a while and just drove home in silence. I told her I want to talk to her this morning to sort things out but she ignored me and left the house.
submitted by /u/wold-into to r/AmItheAsshole